Ho ho ho, folks. Porking his new donkey indeed! Did you really think I was going to let the old year finish without one final update? Just because my house has been full of people for the last three weeks I'm not going to let that get in the way of giving you the final demo round up of 2002. But first I'd like to start with an apology to Stubby.

You see, I know how hard he worked on his Easy 100% of The Dismal Oubliette which he posted in the last update, and I had promised him that I'd do the update when he finally finished it because, let's face it, posting your own demo is a bit like wanking over your partner's back while they're asleep and sticking the sheets to them: you're quite proud of having done it but you feel a bit silly telling everyone about it yourself. It's far better if you tell someone else and then they tell everyone else the story.

Sorry, dude. I fucked up. Not being able to use my PC is no excuse for not telling everyone about you wanking over Jozsef. :-)

Our first demos of the night are from Timo Nieminen who has made TWO Id improvements. Sadly, these could be the last demos we see from Timo for quite a while as he is off to the army soon. Take care, Bud, and have a great time shooting people for real!

• He improved his own Easy 100% of The Tower Of Despair by one second to 1:03. This demo is part of the Qd100Qlite2 project but he thought he might as well release it now so you can all tell him how good he is before he goes away.
• He then did the Easy 100% marathon of The Realm Of Black Magic in the staggering time of 11:20, forty seconds faster than Marlo and only seven seconds slower than Qd100Qlite, which if you consider that his e2m6 was more than 20 seconds slower shows you just how good the running on the other six levels is. Of particular note is the e2m2 route which is worth the download on it's own. :-)

We now move on to SDA's very own "fist of death", Thomas Bergendorff.

• He has continued to work on the popular ikspq1, this time taking the Nightmare 100% from young Fleck with this 1:47, nine seconds faster.
• He then took both runs on the twisty, turny, bluey ikspq4. Just check out the difference in time between Easy and Nightmare skill. None of that "same as the Easy Run" shit here!
  • He motored through the Easy Run without breaking a sweat in 0:57, four seconds faster than Carl.
  • He then took twelve seconds off of Justin's much more difficult Nightmare Run to get the time down to 2:05.

Next, a moral lesson for you all. A few weeks ago, after capturing the Easy 100% of mexx8b from Justin, Lowdis found that the Nightmare 100% was just too tough so he called on Thomas Stubgaard, the undisputed NH master, for help. At first he declined: after all, there are still a few Id records he hasn't taken yet. But after a few days of pestering he finally agreed and produced this outstanding 2:57, nine seconds faster than Optic. An excellent demo, in my humble opinion. So where's the moral? Well, since he had the measure of the map Stubby decided he might as well piss on Bergie's Easy 100% record as well, so he quickly knocked out this 2:26, fourteen seconds faster. So let that be a lesson to you all: If you ask the devil for help, before you know it he'll be drinking champagne out of the crack of your arse.

Our final demo of the evening goes back to the point I was making at the start of this update, because it's by Me. In fact, forget wanking on your partner, posting your own demo is a bit like sneaking into your Mother's bedroom while she's asleep and shitting on her face so when she wakes up and looks in the mirror she thinks she's grown a big brown moustache in the night. So I shall say nothing about the demo except I've wanted to own this record for over three years now and unfortunately it stinks worse than your Mother's facial hair. It's the Nightmare 100% of rdend in 3:58, one lousy second faster than DanielL.

In other news, if you haven't done so already head on over to Ill Mind Moves and grab the QrdQ Speech Add-On which, in a nice twist, see's Ingmar getting some squeaky little girl to speak all the text from QrdQ to turn the movie version into (and I quote...) "a damn hot piece of Quake-machinima and -gameplay". Shit-hot stuff!

And speaking about damn hot pieces of Quake-machinima I'm sorry to say that (obviously) The Dimension Of The Gibbed has been slightly delayed. This was mostly due to me spending so many hours trying to get it looking the best it could that my wife threatened (very reasonably, really) to leave me if I didn't take a break from it for a few days, and then it was Christmas and we had guests staying in my PC room, etc, etc. So as long as there's no serious problems with myself, the other "actors" or the technical crew it should be out in just a few short weeks. It could have been rushed out before Christmas but as far as I'm concerned if a jobs worth doing it's worth doing to the best of your ability, so there you go. :-)

Lastly, on behalf of myself, Nolan, Thomas and Thomas I'd like to say a huge thank-you (in no particular order) to Arturo Garcia Lasca, Weixing Ye, Xiaokui Xiao, Rickard Axelsson, Robert Axelsson, Basil de Vries, Michael Hudson, Timo Nieminen, Daniel Hansson, Denis Nazarov, Carl Tholin, Elin Martensson, Peter Abrahamsson, Chris Ploran, Daniel Andersson, Alena Malikova, Evan Wagner, Jozsef Szalontai, Attila Csernyik, Peter Horvath, Amrik Kochhar, Evelyn Morgan , Jonny Andersson, Rutger Baks, Rebecca Axelsson, Pär Josefsson, Johan Nilsson, Dan Stukanev, Alexander Lindgren, Martin Selinus, Anders Nordensten, Jonna Andersson, Stefan Schwoon, David Hocking, Mattias Berggren, Aleksander Osipov, Mads-Peter Stubgaard, Tim Doherty, Valeriy Burmistrov, Jesse van Dijk, Will Marsh, Hannu Kankaanpaa, Drew Van Lanen, Gaylord, Jakob Huddgins, Josh Zayas, Daniel Magnusson, Kimmo Polvivaara, Brent Wise, Jamie Lee Kwen, Ilkka Kurkela , Fredrik Eckers, Justin Fleck, Markus Taipale, Wim Loones, Marlo Galinski and Oldrich Vohradnik, plus anyone else who's entered one of our contests or just drops in to read this page from time to time (and, of course, Paps, J00bs, Icey and F4nt from PQ). We've had a great year and it wouldn't be possible without you guys. I doubt that Quake speedrunning can last forever, but with your continued support we can at least make sure 2003 ROCKS. :-)

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

HAPPY NEW YEAR FØØLS!!!!

Morfy had promised to do an update today, but I guess the old man is too busy porking his new donkey, so you'll just have to wait till next year to see the final demos of 2002 :-)

I'll leave you with this famous quote from John Walentik:

"Beer glorious beer. Sing the praises of the first man to take barley and ferment the results now known as beer. Tip a cold pilsner to that unknown brewer. Give thanks to the beer god. I know not what course others may take but as for me... give me another beer!"

We've got a few neat surprises for you this christmas, let's kick it off with the latest QdQ production entitled Quake done Backwards! Here's the full scoop from the Quake done Quick site:

Quite a few people get a "retro" feeling when they play Quake these days - well, we give a new meaning to that. This year's Christmas present from QdQ, courtesy of Jozsef Szalontai, Rutger Baks, and others, is Quake done Backwards. This speedrun completes Quake (yet again) with a new twist - the levels are completed in reverse order, starting at end. This enables quite a few new tricks and routes. This project has been sitting on the backburner for quite a long time - we're glad we could complete it. Merry Christmas, and enjoy Quake done Backwards.

Next up we have two id demos courtesy of Jozsef Szalontai and your humble updater (me)....

• Jozsef actually did this Nightmare Run of The Wizard's Manze quite some time ago, but from what I can understand he deems it too difficult to attempt again. He managed to squeeze out another second, and improved Ingmar's record to get 0:36. And as it has become tradition that nearly every Jozsef id record is a MUST DOWNLOAD, this is no exception :-)
• I don't think a Jozsef record has ever been beaten by more than 2-3 seconds (correct me if I'm wrong!), but today is the day folks.... BEHOLD! I spent 1 and a half months trying every possible trick/route in every possible way, and I ended up beating Jozsef's Easy 100% of The Dismal Oubliette by 30 (YES, 30 FRIGGIN' SECONDS!!!) to get 3:08! I _did_ promise Joe that I would take my record back and so I did :-) MUST DOW....ehm, can you give yourself a MUST DOWNLOAD?? I think given the fact that I beat a Jozsef record by 30 seconds I can :-)

The only Chinese to ever grace the tables on SDA, Weixing Ye found time in between studies to improve 3 of his own records:

• First to fall was his Easy 100% of dazsp2 which he improved by 2 seconds to get 0:45. Nice work with the nailgun! He went on to do the same with the Nightmare 100% which he also improved by 2 seconds to get 0:47. Same tactic as in the Easy 100%, just a few more monsters to get rid off.
• He then went on to improve his Nightmare Run of dazsp2b using a new cunning route which enabled him to improve his record by 5 seconds. This 1:01 contains some really nice tricks and is definitely worth a download!

Thomas Bergendorff won't rest before he has beaten enough Optic records to bring him down from #1 spot on the SDA tables...

• He blasted his way through the Easy Run of thetomb in 1:19, 2 seconds faster than Justin. He then struggled to get the Nightmare Run. But in the end the outcome was better than the Easy Run. He beat Basil by 7 seconds to get 1:18. As he says in his text file "the monsters behave better on nightmare skill"....

It seems like Bergendorff has finally persuaded someone into helping him with the Justin battering... And who better to pick than Arturo Garcia Lasca!

• He did the Easy 100% of despair2 in 1:47, 2 seconds faster than Justin. Personally I think this map suck goatnuts. Too much damn water and too narrow to be any fun, but Arturo actually did a good job on a crappy map like this :-)

WAIT, did I say "the only Chinese to ever grace the tables on SDA"?? Well well well, it seems like Weixing has teamed up with a friend of his to deliver 5 coops of high quality. Would you all please welcome SDA's newest runner (and second Chinese to grace the tables on SDA), Mr. Xiaokui Xiao! Welcome aboard X.X.!

• Let's kick it off with the Nightmare 100% they did on The Door To Chthon. With very clever route planning and alot of quadded rocket boosts, they managed to improve Nolan and Evan's record by 7 seconds to get 0:36! MUST DOWNLOAD! Satisfied now Weixing?? :-)
• Oh sweet baby, how I love this! 2 guys, 2 axes, and plenty of mad chopping. This simply doesn't get any better if you're a sucker for the axe like I am :-) They tackled the tricky Easy 100% on dazsp2c to get 0:58. And they went on from there to tackle the even trickier Nightmare 100% to get 1:12. /me recommends these...
• And finally they spent some time doing the 100%'s on pagan. First up is the Easy 100% in 0:20, and then the Nightmare 100% in 0:20 as well, both only 1 second slower than the 3 player demos.

That's the end of the demo section, let's move on to the news tidbits....

Ingmar has started a verbal abuse against those who can't be arsed to get a "personal gamespy id". I agree with most of what he says. I myself avoided getting a personal gamespy id until recently though, but that was merely because I could just ftp into SDA's archives and download whatever I wanted to :-) Take a look at what he has to say here!

Things are happening over at Underworldfan's QUAKE & CUBE Single Player Map Reviews. His Hall of Fame section is up and running, but more importantly (to the SDA community) is that Bergendorff has agreed to help Underworldfan out by recording some demos for his map reviews. SWEET!

And final news for today is that The Nolans 2k2 are moving steadily forward, while we still have no date on when to have the event. Nolan has been working hard on improving the Nolans2k2 page, and things are looking really good so far. The list of all demos done in 2002 is created automaticly now, instead of me having to type in every single demo! What a relief!! We (the SDA staff) has also decided NOT to include demos posted in the year 2002 but recorded in 2001. This is due to several reasons I won't bother you with, but the bottom line is that a few demos has been given the boot because of that, but it's only a very little percentage of the total amount of demos. The Nolans2k2 event might be prolonged a bit due to some unexpected personal issues on my behalf though, but I'll try to bring it to you as soon as I can...

Oops, I almost forgot! Two new profiles, an updated one from Weixing and one from newcomer Xiaokui Xiao.

Bye for now and happy holidays!

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

They say that christmas is the season to be jolly, and what could be more jolly than a beefy SDA update? Well, I guess the LotR - The Two Towers could, as well as the Terminator III trailer which will be shown all around the world along with LotR! Oh man, I can't wait for another edition of The Terminator!! AH'NULD IS KING! Anyways, enough of my Ah'nuld talk, let's got on with it....

Thomas Bergendorff has been at it again! Nothing less than 9 demos this time! He's turning into a lethal killing machine!

• Easy Run of mexx3 in 1:05, 2 seconds faster than Jonny.
• Easy Run of mexx10 in 2:02, 16 seconds faster than Shambler.
• Easy Run of epoch in 0:54, 2 seconds faster than Arturo. Cool demo alert!
• Easy 100% of mexx9b in 4:26, 15 seconds faster than Justin (he even got 4 more kills! Way to go Bergie)
• Easy 100% of mexx9c in 3:42, 78 seconds faster than Ilkka!
• Nightmare Run of mexx9c in 2:08, 22 seconds faster than Stefan.
• Nightmare Run of mexx10 in 2:40, 77 seconds faster than Justin.
• Nightmare 100% of mexx9b in 7:07, 47 seconds faster than Justin. Mayhem alert!
• Nightmare 100% of mexx9c in 6:29, 160 seconds faster than Andrey!

I personally think Bergendorff is entitled to win a Nolan award for his sheer volume of demos this year *hint*

The funny talking dutchman, Basil de Vries has made a return to SDA.

• Easy 100% of spring2 in 0:28, 2 seconds faster than David Hocking.

Mr. Michael Hudson, the Dissolution of Eternity "specialist" leads the way....

• Marathon Easy Run of doe1 - Hell's Fortress in 9:42, 37 seconds faster than Tim. It's nice to see someone with the guts to tackle the doe levels, they're bitchy!

The Axelsson brothers has made another shitload of coops:

• Nightmare Run of e2m5 in 0:25, new to the tables. (0:37)
• Easy Run of church in 0:53, new to the tables. (0:57)
• Easy 100% of church in 0:58, new to the tables. (1:08)
• Nightmare Run of church in 1:01, new to the tables. (1:06)
• Nightmare 100% of church in 1:14, new to the tables. (1:29)
• Easy 100% of con1 in 0:19, new to the tables. (0:20)
• Nightmare 100% of con1 in 0:18, new to the tables. (0:20)
• Easy Run of doom2_01 in 0:07, 1 second faster than Attila/Peter. (0:08) The 'egg' demo included in the .dz contains one of the funniest things I've ever seen in Quake! Make sure you check it out!
• Easy Run of empire in 0:19, new to the tables. (0:20)
• Nightmare Run of empire in 0:19, new to the tables. (0:20)
• Easy Run of gatordiv in 0:55, 1 second faster than Hansson/Basil. (0:56)

Ingmar has woken up from his winter slumber and found time to update Ill Mind Moves. Check it out!

That's it and that's that...

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

After just over two months of non-stop contest action The Dimension Of The Gibbed challenge has come to a close as Jozsef Szalontai takes the win in The Gore To Chthon.

This was an increbibly close contest with Arturo Garcia Lasca, Weixing Ye and Timo Nieminen all getting within 2.5 seconds of Joe's winning time.

That gives Joe four wins out of seven, with Timo taking two wins and Stubby taking one.

A big thank-you to everyone that has taken part in this contest, it's been fun to organise and watch all the demos so who knows, I may organise another one in the near future.

But first I would like to finish off the DotG recams. A few lucky people have already been sent some of them to review and these are just a few of the comments we got back...

• "Well, they're alright, I suppose."
• "I didn't understand it."
• "Sorry. Couldn't be bothered to watch them."
• "How do you get them to play?"

So you see, it should be a real treat!

Rooooooaaaaaaarrrrr!! Hey there folks, I'M BACK! I took a well deserved break from updating, but now that Morfans is back at the farm in Scotland screwing his donkey 24/7, I figured it was time to put some weight off his shoulders by doing this update.

We'll soon be gearing up for another edition of The Nolans! You can check out a list of all demos done in the year 2002, right HERE! The list is already quite massive, but there's still time to put your demos in, so make haste! We have yet to determine a date for the event, but my guess is that we'll have it early January.... So stay tuned for The Nolans 2k2! It will be the award show of the year :-)

On to the demos! Bergendorff continues his Flecker battering, by doing yet another handful of Mexx demos! Let's post them, as Morfans so nicely put it, in 'classic SDA' style:

• Easy Run of mexx9a in 1:18, 3 seconds faster than Evan.
• Easy 100% of mexx9a in 2:23, 4 seconds faster than Justin.
• Nightmare Run of mexx9a in 1:44, 16 seconds faster than Justin.
• Nightmare 100% of mexx9a in 3:58, 21 seconds faster than Justin.
• Easy Run of mexx9b in 2:13, 26 seconds faster than Carl.
• Nightmare Run of mexx9b in 2:46, 46 seconds faster than Justin.
• Easy Run of mexx9c in 1:33, 11 seconds faster than Justin.

The Cheated Site has been updated! It has been more or less dead for half a year. The last update was on July 17th! My God how time flies... There isn't a whole lot of demos, but the ones that I've recieved are certainly of high quality, so head on over to the Cheated Site and take a peek!

It's been some time since we've had a Bunny Comparison update as well, but I've recieved a couple of demos, mostly by Phil, also known as Smelly GuPH. Check 'em out!

And remember that TONIGHT is your last chance to submit demos for The Gore To Chthon contest! This is the last contest in the Gibbing series, so waste no time!

Oh, and a quick note to all your choirfellas and annoying cunts out there who made me not want to update SDA anymore... DON'T PISS ME OFF AGAIN OR I'LL BUST YOU TO SMITHEREENS!! This is no joke....

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

Hey, what do you know. Our first Id improvement for weeks in the last update, and another one in this update! They do say that good things come in threes (in which case I'd like to meet a girl with good breasts) so maybe someone will send in another Id improvement for next time. As an added incentive, if someone does send one in in the next week, I will personally guarentee that if we ever meet in real life I will not kick them square in the balls as hard as I can. Now how generous is that??!!??

Following on from his epic victory in the Gibburat Vertigo contest, Timo Nieminen decided to see if his winning route could be applied to the normal Ziggurat Vertigo Easy 100%. It certainly could, and with the current record at 0:52 he got a 0:50 on his very first try. Ten minutes later he did this 0:49 with a big mistake in it, and a couple of days later he tidied it up to 0:47, five seconds faster than Martin. MUST DOWNLOAD

It was surely only going to be a matter of time before someone equalled Joe's pagan Easy Run on Nightmare skill and got the optimum 0:08. There are very few people with the skillz to do this, but it appears that everyone's favourite Russian syllable juggler, Denis Nazarov, is one. Outstanding.

In his usual prolific fashion, Thomas Bergendorff has gone Mexx-Mental and continued in the task of deopticifying the Mexx levels.

• First, a couple of demos on the hugely elevating mexx5.
  • Justin's record took a one second improvement (don't ask me how, it just did. If you really want to know watch them side by side and see) to 1:19.
  • And a massive forty-two second improvement to the Nightmare 100% to 3:56 is an excellent demonstration of why Lowdis is fast earning himself the nickname The Bollocks.[1]
• Skipping daintily on to mexx7, a former Optic TO, now totally in the hands of Lowdis. It's a long and not particularly run friendly map, so not much to say about it, really. I'll just post them in "classic SDA" style. :-)
  • He did the Easy Run in 1:43, three seconds faster than Justin.
  • He did the Nightmare Run in 1:48 three seconds faster than Justin.
  • He did the Easy 100% in 4:09 thirteen seconds faster than Justin.
  • He did the Nightmare 100% in 4:53 two seconds faster than Justin.
• He finished off this weeks assault with an excellent Easy 100% of mexx8b. He used a couple of neat manoeuvers (such as using a knight to hold the bars, instead of the fiend) to improve the Fleckmeisters time by eighteen seconds to 2:38. It appears that he doesn't have the balls to attempt the Nightmare 100%. Frankly, I don't blame him. I used to hold that record and it's HELL, and Justin had a VERY lucky run. But even so, such a craven display unfortunately has to lose him his "Bollocks" honourific. Tough, I know, but also fair. :-)

On to some more stunning coop action from Robert Axelsson and Rickard Axelsson. These guys have always been good, but since Rickard's skillz have really developed (in the last eight months or so) they are looking (now what's that word I'm looking for.... oh yes) 1337.

• They started off using the old "throw Rickard into the kill trigger so Robert can get through unharmed" trick on coagula to do the Nightmare Run in 0:08, one second faster than Stefan and Matthias and equaling their Easy Run time.
• Then they had a bit of fun on one of my favourite maps, scoop.
  • They improved the Easy Run by four seconds, once again over the German Duo, to 0:23. Same route, slicker play.
  • Much the same route for the Nightmare Run except that the concentration of grunts at the start/end means that a little killin' is in order before they head off inside. 0:36, new to the tables.
• Two very nice demos on polygon2 followed, depriving P-B and Fredrik of both 2P runs.
  • A sweeeet rocket boost from Rickard sent his big bro flying high in this 0:17 Nightmare Run, one second faster.
  • Since the Easy Run lacks the RL it was necessary to get a bit of shaft riding action going. They saved a second by soing it without the benefit of a slope jump to get 0:19.
• On to p_se_2...
  • They took their third record from Stefan and Matthias, this time by two seconds, with this 0:38.
  • More of the same on Nightmare Skill. A cleaner run this time but still the same time of 0:38. I was kinda hoping this was going to beat the Easy Run, but it is Nightmare skill, FFS. Maybe I expect too much. :-)

Before I go I'll give you all a final reminder that you only have this weekend and a couple of days after that to get in your entries to The Gore To Chthon. Closing time is Midnight CET on Wednesday so best gibbing fists forward.

Time for a smoke. I've given up drinking since I saw the effect it had on Nolan... ;-)

Laterz.

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

[1] NOTE: This is a complement, not an insult.

Hey there, my funky chickens. It's "Big Friday" here at SDA, and so we have another update for you that's longer even than Tholin's man-muscle! We have, results, demos, a new contest, some assorted bits of news (probably) but to start off we have our first Id improvement for some weeks.

When it comes to accurate shooting, I don't think anyone out there can quite touch Thomas Stubgaard. During the whole of this Castle Of The Damned Nightmare 100% he only messes up one shot, and that doesn't slow him down any. To beat this 1:05 would take an amazing amount of skill and luck. One second faster than his previous record. MUST DOWNLOAD.

Before we move on to the rest of the demos let's take a look at the results from the Gib Keep contest. Once again the unstopable Jozsef Szalontai blew away the competition with some amazing play. Ken and Orbs showed some real skill in their demos but the power of the Bunny Machine would not be denied. Unfortunately, the results aren't actually posted yet because Nolan made a little faux-pas. But the demos and exact times will be posted as soon as possible.

So that makes it a Joe-Timo-Joe-Stubby-Timo-Joe series so far with only one more contest to go. If you would like to see your name added to this rolecall of destruction and your demo added into the Dimension Of The Gibbed movie production then you need to head over to The Gore To Chthon and give it your best. Closing date for this contest will be Midnight CET Wednesday 11th December 2002 so that gives even the worst or busiest of you time to get a demo in. Of course, if you don't care about me or my feelings then don't send a demo in. I'll probably just spiral down into a deep depression because nobody gives a thought to my feelings. But don't you worry about that. *sniff* I'll be okay.[1]

Making his return to SDA after serving his time in exile for "crimes against the archive" is Denis Nazarov. He improved Weixing's Nightmare 100% of pagan by two seconds with some loony bunny work and "Horvath style" mad grenade tossing. 0:39. Highly recommended.

Also highly recommended is Daniel Hansson's Easy Run of ikspq1. There is one major mistake with a knight in here which costs two seconds, but at 0:45 it is still two seconds faster than Peter, which shows you how smooth the running is. (Apart from the fuck up with the knight, obviously).

Time for more Total Ownage, Thomas Bergendorff style. This time his target is mexx4, where he already has the Easy Run.

• He stormed the Easy 100% in 2:28, 12 seconds faster than Optic. Two cool things to look out for here: The shambler getting telefragged by the zombie and the fact that he actually dies AFTER exiting the level. :-)
• He then improved Justin's Nightmare 100% by a big twenty-nine seconds to get 3:40. This level (especially the second half) is mad on Nightmare skill. I'm still amazed that he managed to survive "enforcer boulevard" and then fought off a whole pack of fiends in "the spiky room of doom" with a quad rocket launcher all with just 9 health!!
• And to take TO he beat Justin's Nightmare Run by one second on, if you believe him, his first attempt!! 1:34.

Basil de Vries has been refining his intermission killing on dma1. Well, it's not actually the IK he's refined, it's the running before he exits. He improved both his records by one second to take the Easy 100% to 0:19 and the Nightmare 100% to 0:19. There is still room for improvement here of a second or perhaps two, so if you have the patience to do an optimum run and then find it cuts to the wrong intermission screen this could be for you! ;-)

Our last demo for this week is a cool coop from Robert and Rickard Axelsson doome1m7 0:30, one second faster than that other Swedish tag-team Maggy and Bergy. Doom maps certainly do rock!

We have also received another updated profile, this time from Rolle. His picture shows he has an admirable approach to drinking but, like Carl, he seems to have developed a penchant for fucking silly hats. Is this now seen as high fashion amongst The Udders?

Before I go I'd like to draw your attention to the new link at the top of this page. You are now but one click away from our IRC channel (assuming you have a default IRC client installed). Thanks to Jesse for showing us this simple piece of HTML that we probably should have known anyway. :-) Of course, if for some reason it doesn't work then join #qdq on quakenet and tell us about it. :-)

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

[1] How's that for emotional blackmail? Do you all feel sorry for me now? Hmmm? What's that you say? No? Bastards!

Just a very, very quick update to remind you that you have until MIDNIGHT CET TONIGHT to get your entries in for Gib Keep. A full contest and demo update will follow tomorrow. :-)

The countdown is over, the winner is named, the updater has been drinking. When last we spoke we had reached 5996.

Thomas Bergendorff found a new route on hellbase, and since he was there he thought he might as well take TO of the level.

• He improved Daniel's Easy Run by twelve seconds by using the simple observation that if you have to pick up the GL anyway then you don't need to take a detour to get the RL. 0:40. 5997
• He made the same deduction on the Nightmare Run, and a reduction of eleven seconds over Daniel to 0:43. 5998
• He found the Nightmare 100% quite good fun so he made the effort to improve Justin's record by eleven seconds to 1:41. 5999
• Even though he didn't enjoy the Easy 100% so much, only improving it by six seconds, this 1:43 is still our 6000th demo.

So there you have it. Our Demo 6000 winner was the same person as our Demo 5000 winner. And he's also an SDA staffer. Does that sound like a fix to you? It does to me. Fix! FIX! FIX!!

Missing out by one place is Michael Hudson. He made his third improvement to r1m4, this time by two seconds to 0:49. The grenade boost wasn't as smooth this time but the exit jump was perfect. He had a bit of a brown-trouser moment when the ogre in the roof didn't die, but apart from that this is a good run.

Is there something significant about this demo? Rickard Axelsson has taken one of his brother's records. Will this mean bloodshed chez Axelsson? Does Robert still have the skills to fight back? It's the Easy Run of pg2 in 1:32, two seconds faster.

Now for a real treat. Basil de Vries has taken both 100% records on dma1 from Arturo. These records looked close to optimum so how did he take another second off each record to get the Nightmare 100% to 0:20 and the Easy 100% to 0:20? The answer is intermission kills. Lot's of intermission kills. FIVE intermission kills! These are slightly sloppy in the middle room so they are still improvable (Ken?) but they are both excellent work. Good man!

Returning to Lowdis for the final two demos; both the r1m3 runs.

• He did a trick that, once I saw it, I thought was quite obvious (if very difficult) and improved Evan's Nightmare Run by four seconds to 0:16. Stunning!
• The same thing on the Easy Run except only three seconds faster than Evan. 0:17.

Before we leave I urge, nay implore, you to check out Carl's updated profile. It seems like "Sweden's Mr Sex" has gone from the sweet little boy we used to know and is now a proper man. The evidence is: decent music, drinking beer, smoking tabs and facial hair. He slightly spoils the effect, though, by wearing a fucking silly hat and taking what appears to be his Mom to the pub. :-P

*Sssssssslllluuuuurrrrrrrppppppp*

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

The latest installment of the Dimension Of The Gibbed Challenge : The Gibburat Vertigo is at an end. This was quite a tight contest with some well thought out routes but once the gibs had finally settled it was Timo Nieminen who took his thoroughly deserved second win of the series.

Please join me in congratulating Timo on his win and thanking Thomas, Basil and Arturo for their brave efforts.

And if you'd like to help convince me that running contests is worth all the hard work, head on over to Gib Keep[1] for the penultimate contest in this blood-splattered series. It's worth it if only because I use the phrase "festival of viscera".

The closing date for this contest is Midnight CET Wednesday 27th November 2002, so you have slightly less time than for the previous contests. This is unavoidable as I am being booted out of my job on Friday 29th and would like to get the final contest in the series under way before I go. It is also to try to ensure that the Dimension Of The Gibbed production is released before the end of December, which at the moment is looking very likely as long as I don't get distracted by trying to add special effects into it too often. :-)

Don't forget to check back here in a couple of days (unless you're too busy gibbing) for the latest demo round-up including the result of our Demo 6000 countdown!

Holy mother of fuck. SIX THOUSAND DEMOS. And that doesn't include contest demos. Well done everyone. And I mean that seriously. Well done all of us. From the greatest (Me. (And I suppose Markus, Joe, Peter, etc)) to the lowest (Ken, Amrik, Jonny, etc). Top effort.

SDA : We are become rather large.

[1]Yeah, it's a shit name. But I couldn't come up with anything better for "Gloom Keep". :-)

Another long break between updates. Why? Because I've been spending all my spare time messing around with remaic, demtool and demix doing the recams for The Dimension Of The Gibbed. If you've never tried this sort of shit before I have to say that it's actually quite fun once you get the hang of it, but it does take a lot of time. So if you'd like to help me waste more of my time them make sure you get your entry in to the Gibburat Vertigo contest. Deadline is, of course, this Sunday.

But since I've got a couple of hours to spare it's time to continue our countdown to Demo 6000. We ended the last update on 5983 so lets's have a look and see how we've progressed.

Ohhhhh. Looks like Axelsson Junior's been busy. But before we get to him...

Arturo Garcia Lasca has recaptured one of the pagan records from Weixing. He beat his Easy 100% by one second to equal the Nightmare time of 0:41. 5984. Of course, he did the Nightmare 100% in 0:41 first before realising that it was the Easy 100% he was supposed to be doing, but there you go. :-)

Basil de Vries found an old demo he did on prison and realised it was faster than the current record. It's the Nightmare 100% one second faster than Anders time. 0:56. 5985

Now it's time to get all Axelssony, starting with the beautiful Rickard.

• He beat Justin's Easy 100% of doom2_04 by four seconds getting 0:47. 5986. Unfortunately, in his .txt it appears that he's discovered the joys of classical art in ascii form. Oh good god. :-)
• He also improved DanielH's Easy Run of the excellent pg1 by one second to get this dragon-shagging 1:21. 5987

Then along came Robert to complete the infamous brother/sister coop team. (I'll let you decide which one's which.)

• They had a nice time pissing in the evilpool, doing both 100%s.
  • First the Easy in 0:46. 5988
  • Then the Nightmare in 0:49. 5989
• They then shared their grenades for some big jumping action on pg1 and destroyed Daniel and Jonny's Easy Run by seventeen seconds to 0:55. 5990

Next to join the party was Peter Abrahamsson, and together they made three impressive demos.

• Robert can never resist a boss map, so he dragged the other two onto hipend for some Nightmare Armagon bashing, which they did in 0:19, one second faster than Nolan, Jesse and Ingmar. 5991
• The layout of pagan makes it an ideal coop 100% map, and the guys delivered in fine style.
  • The Easy 100% tumbled to a nice 0:19. 5992
  • And, of course, the Nightmare 100% was done in the same time. 0:19. 5993. Eighteen would be a nice time for this level. :-P

Finally, to complete the LAN madness, Elin Mårtensson joined the crew. Before we get to the demos I'll just mention that Elin has sent us a profile, but no picture to go with it! I have to assume that she is very shy, or I suppose she could just be hideously embarassing. (Or her hair was a mess)

• They warmed up with an Easy Run of ikspq5. It's a pretty messy demo but quite fun and clocks in at 0:36. 5994
• They then continued with an Easy Run of theledge. Like the two player version except with more players and one second faster. 0:11. 5995
• And finally a scorching demo on a map that was made for extreme Mad Coop Nightmare 100% action, doom2_07. Clocking in at 0:14 the mad demo is only two seconds faster than the SP time, but then again Valeriy's demo is perfect so there's no shame in that. :-) 5996

Okay, obviously I haven't numbered the demos in exactly the received order. But since we didn't reach 6000 I didn't think it really mattered. There's already a couple of demos in the inbox so I think we'll have a winner by the weekend...

It's been a busy week for profiles. As well as Elin's we've also had a new one from Mike, and updated profiles from Stubby, Nolan, Robert and Timo.

In case you haven't stumbled across it already, there's a new level review site out there called Underworldfan's Quake & Cube Single Player Map Reviews. The title just about sums it up but as an additional aside he's also taking votes for the top 10 maps of all time. So if you have an opinion, hop over and have a look.

See ya when ya legal.

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

It seems the ever hateable gamespy fileplanet is having a breakdown... if you go to something like this the public xfer3 and xfer4 links aren't even listed anymore. Maybe they're just temporarily down but it's a load of crap. If anybody has lots of web space available for us to put older demos on that would be great. Currently we've been putting new demos on stubbz's new domain but he does not get much space there.

UPDATE: As of 8:15 AM they appear to be working again...

The fourth part of the Dimension Of The Gibbed challenge, The Gibbly Grotto has finished, but it could be some days before the results are posted due to the huge, huge number of entries we had.

That, my friends, is called sarcasm. In fact only two people sent entries in, Arturo Garcia Lasca and Thomas Stubgaard, and it was Stubbz that beat Ken by less than half a second to claim the crown and his place in the refilmed production! So head on over to The Gibbly Grotto and download both demos. Then go to the Gibburat Vertigo for the next part of the challenge. (don't forget to read the rules carefully as there is a special "exit with rockets" rule to this contest.) This level should be a lot easier to complete than the previous two and with a lot more scope for rocket boosted madness so hopefully we should see more entries...

We will start this week's round-up with a sweet demo from Carl Tholin. Some people (all his friends) might claim that Carl is a dick, but his grenade placing is second to none and some ultra smooth air control allowed him to do the Easy Run of rdend in 1:06, improving Ilkka's time by a fat ten seconds. A fine example of what can happen with a rocket launcher, a quad, a pentagram and some curvy walls. Well done to the person that designed the level (whoever the fuck you are).

He then did the same thing to the Nightmare Run and, apart from a couple of mistakes just after the gold key, turned in an impressive 1:33, three seconds faster than Daniel.

Michael Hudson has sent in his second ever demo, and it's a one second improvement on his first one. This Easy Run of r1m4 is a much cleaner run than his previous but he made one silly mistake in this 0:51 that cost him two or three seconds, so further improvement is still possible.

Weixing Ye has made an assault on pagan, taking all the records except for Joe's optimum Easy Run.

• Taking the final female record from the level he improved Alena's Nightmare Run by one second to 0:09. Who out there (apart from Joe) has the skillz to do an 0:08?
• He improved Arturo's Nightmare 100% by three seconds to 0:41. Much the same route but a few nice tweaks and loads of killing while twisting through the air while bunnying.
• The Easy 100% went the same way but slightly slower at 0:42, two seconds faster than Ken.

Recently Thomas Bergendorff has been letting his mind wander and has taken records from a whole load of different people. This week he has regained his focus and is back to improving as many of Justin's records as he can...

• The Nightmare run of colony fell by just one second to 0:30. Not a lot of tricks, just twisting and turning and bunnying faster than the Flecker.
• Much more impressive is a nine second improvement to 0:56 of Optic's Nightmare run of earth.
• And finally he improved the Nightmare 100% of escape to 1:31, three seconds faster. Another run unfriendly map but for some reason people seem to like it.
• He finished off by going back to colony and taking both 100% records, the Easy 100% in 1:22, twelve seconds faster, and the Nightmare 100% in 1:40, two seconds faster. Both fairly basic, straight-forward runs but done with that all important touch of style.

Daniel Hansson made another two improvements to his Easy Run of badland2, first by one second to 2:31 and then by another second to 2:30. If you've never seen this map before then be prepared for two and a half minutes high-octane running action, and then be bitterly disappointed when you find out there's only about thirty seconds of running and a couple of minutes of waiting for stuff to happen.

Back to Weixing again as he has another try at dazsp2b.

• Nightmare Run by one second to 1:06.
• He improved his own Nightmare 100% by twenty seconds to 2:15, demonstrating just how much he has improved in the last six months.
• And his Easy 100% by fifteen seconds to 1:59.

That demo was the 5983rd to make it on to the tables. And so we begin the countdown to Demo 6000, with a fabulous prize on offer for the person that submits the 6000th demo. Well, I say "fabulous" but to be honest we haven't thought of one yet. But just ask Bergie, the sender of demo 5000, the prizes are something you will treasure all your life!

Oh, hang on. We never did send him his prize. It must still be around here somewhere...

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

Isn't it lovely to see a Nolan update (or a "Pflugdate" as we call it around here) again? But I'm not sure what he means about no demos. There are thirteen[1] new pieces of art for your enjoyment and, unusually, not one of them is from Sweden!

Okay, I admit that technically Lowdis is Swedish but first and foremost he's a member of the SDA crew, and as such he transends such petty things as national boundaries.

Oh. And the Axelssons are Swedes. Maybe it's best you just ignore my opening paragraph.

Apart from the bit about Nolan, of course. I meant that.

The first pagan demos from guys have come in. One from a big, butch Hungarian, and two that weren't.

• Jozsef Szalontai improved Scion's Easy Run by two seconds to 0:08 by utilising Joe-strength bunnies and a very cheeky grenade boost (watch the demo in slow motion if you can't see it). I'd say that this has to be the optimum time.
• Arturo Garcia Lasca took Scion's other record on this map , the Nightmare 100%, by six seconds to 0:44. Same route and tricks, just more bunnys and smoother play.
• Ken performed the same route to fill the Easy 100% gap, also getting 0:44.

Basil de Vries continues his comeback by taking TO of the long (but fun) fmb8.

• He found a couple of nice new tricks to improve Hannu's Easy Run. Shame he cocked some of them up. :-) 1:00. Four seconds faster.
• He filled the empty slot for the Nightmare Run using much the same route but with a few more monsters to avoid (and a few more mistakes) giving him 1:10. Watch out for the nice monster slide coming back from the key.
• He also used some new shortcuts and grenade jumps on the Easy 100% which got him this 4:49. Seven seconds faster than Hannu.
• And to complete the set he beat Tim's Nightmare 100% by seventy-two seconds to 8:33. He had a little trouble finding the last monster to kill and wasted about thirty seconds. So if someone's looking for a challenge then this is improvable if you have the patience. This record also features perhaps the most confusing .txt in the history of the archive. I still can't work out what the hell it's about. :-)

Thomas Bergendorff has been playing with fire.

• He took the Easy 100% of this rather lava intensive map from Marlo with this 1:12, four seconds faster.
• He also delivered a brutal anal reaming to Optic's Nightmare 100% which he improved by sixteen seconds to 1:39.

Former level reviewer and top TV chef Fern has improved his Nightmare Run of ikspq5 by two seconds to 1:02. He also includes another, slightly faster, run but I can't help thinking there's something a little suspicious about it...

Last week Thomas took TO of darkness with some excellent runs. Our final single player demo of the update see us returning to Ken as he breaks that ownage by taking the Easy Run by one second using an additional grenade boost and all round solid play to take the time down to 0:42.

Moving on to some slick coop action from Rickard Axelsson and his fresh faced, cloven hoofed brother Robert Axelsson. They took the Runs on theledge using the fairly obvious route, but done in the fast time of 0:13 (Easy Run) and 0:13 (Nightmare Run).

Following my call last week for the Ladies to send in their profiles we have, at long last, received one from Chris Ploran. I'm not quite sure if it was just a coincidence that he sent his in at this time or if there's something he'd like to tell us all...

Finally, I've been threatened with a swift kick in my capacious scrotum if I don't keep on pimping our IRC channel #qdq. So if you know how to idle, come along to #qdq on quakenet and call Ajare a buttsucker. Try it! It's fun!

Morfans|AWAY

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

[1] This was true when I started writing the update on Friday. There's already five more demos in the inbox but, unfortunately, I can't be frigged to update them now. :-)

I just thought I'd pop in exactly one year after everybody pissed me off and I did my 'you guys all suck' update that maybe I'll do some more. Lately the number of demo submissions has dropped a lot so the one update a week from Morfy is OK but I don't like it so I might help him out. Maybe... not sure yet. Anyway I'm at least going to post a demo I did: the nightmare 100% of czg07c in a mere 9:37. That's faster than my previous EH and over 4 minutes faster than my old NH. You'd all better download it and be impressed or i'll be unhappy ;-)

The third installment of our ongoing Dimension Of The Gibbed Challenge : The Gibopolis is now over and taking his second win of the series I give you Mr Jozsef Szalontai.

As expected this contest had less entries than the previous two but the turnout was still good so I'm hoping for big things from you people on the last three quad heavy maps of the project.

But before we get there we have e1m4 to complete so head on over to The Gibbly Grotto and start killing. Once again you have nearly two weeks to get your entry in. The deadline being Midnight CET Sunday 3rd November 2002. As I'm sure you are all well aware that's the day before my birthday so I shall be expecting either...

1. Cash. (Sterling or US dollars only. None of that "euro" shit.)
2. Sex.
3. Or a demo for The Gibbly Grotto.

...from each and every one of you. The choice is yours.

And while you're all wrestling with such a difficult choice I'll turn your attention to something more elegant, more fragrant, more... LadyQuake.

Yes, after about ten weeks of waiting I think it's fair to say that this experiment is over. I hope you'll all join me in thanking and congratulating Alena Malikova, Evelyn 'Scion' Morgan, Rebecca Axelsson and Elisabeth Johansson for taking part and sending in some cool demos. Alena and Scion have both won a "better than Morfy" award for beating my own personal best time on pagan but who was the overall winner? I think it's only fair, and very patronising, to say that EVERYONE was the winner. :-)

Of course, now that you've had a demo up on SDA you are welcome, actually you're obliged, to submit a profile of yourself and a picture to send the hormone-charged male speedrunners who frequent this site into a rutting frenzy.

This also means that pagan is now open to anyone, be they male, female or Amrik, to submit a demo on. For those of you that sent in speedruns on this map while it was still "ladies only" you will have to send them in again. Sorry, but it's the only fair way.

Yet another rushed update. I had planned to spend all afternoon lazily writing it but I unexpectedly spent four hours in the boozer so I'm stuck with only twenty minutes to get it finished! Better get straight on with the demos.

Barking Basil de Vries has finally returned to planet Earth and he's brought a couple of demos with him.

• He improved Ilkka's Easy 100% of the wonderful ikspq3 by a massive twenty-three seconds to 1:36. Sometimes it's easy to forget that behind the mild mannered madman is a guy that can really play. :-)
• He also filled the empty Nightmare Run slot on imp1sp2. It's a fairly standard run up until the end where he uses some clever play to avoid the shambler carnage. 1:02.

Staying on imp1sp2 for some 100% action, brought to you in a Weixing Ye stylee.

• His recent Easy 100% was due an improvement. And sure enough it arrived in the form of this 2:08, six seconds faster than previously.
• He then (thankfully) destroyed my poor tablefiller of the Nightmare 100% by forty-five seconds to 3:09.
• OpenGL also did a nice improvement to his scream Nightmare 100%. This 1:08 is ten seconds faster than his previous record, and the clean killing and smoother play shown here demonstrates how much his play has developed over the last few months.

Once again we have a fine crop of demos from Thomas Bergendorff, including him taking TO of yet another level.

• The level in question being darkness.
  • He had a real challenge for the Easy Run as Ilkka's record looked very solid. But persistence paid off and he delivered this 0:43, one second faster.
  • He then did the Nightmare Run in 0:47, three seconds faster than Justin. Slightly scrappy, really.
  • Two days later he used the Easy Run route to equal the Easy time of 0:43, four seconds faster than the demo above. An excellent demo.
  • Now that he knew the level he did the Easy 100% eleven seconds faster than Optic with some nice route tweaking and generally fast play to get 1:28.
  • And then a quick five second improvement (over, you guessed it, Optic's time) to the Nightmare 100% gave him Total Ownage. 0:47.
• To finish off another weeks madness he spent a few minutes changing Justin's Easy 100% route on houstrps and then running in this 1:09, seven seconds faster.

I've just realised that I've said nice things about all three of the previous runners. This won't do. I'll get a reputation for being a soft bastard. I'd better be really nasty to the next person...

Ugly Swedish twat Daniel Andersson has taken time off from sucking corpses off to improve the Nightmare Run of jjspq1 to 1:06, three seconds faster than cock faced anus Thomas.

Phew, I'm glad I got that out of my system. Sorry Daniel and Lowdis, I didn't mean it really. I only picked on you two because I want you to be my bitches.

UPDATE (by Stubby): Seems like Amrik had already made a 1:06 back in January, but by mistake it wasn't put in history.txt (i.e. didn't appear on the tables). So the 1:06 points to Amrik's demo now... Sorry Daniel, but your demo had to go :-)

Speaking of bitches, it's finally time to close the LadyQ.. Damn, No time to do this now. I have to go catch my train. Sorry. Next time, I promise. :-)

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

Yes folks. This week it's all about blood. We have new blood, the return of some old blood, a whole bucket full of Swedish blood and, errrr, Nolan's blood.

So in honour of the fact that this is Blood Friday here at SDA I'm going to listen to Slayer's "Reign In Blood", Onslaught's "Blood on the Ice" and Type O Negative's "Bloody Kisses" while I'm writing this update. And if I still haven't finished by then I'm going to have to put on the Bloodhound Gang's "One Fierce Beer Coaster" because that's the only other CD I have with the word "blood" in it.

Demos...

First we have the prolific killing machine that is Thomas Bergendorff. In the last three months or so since he began taking records like a madman he has moved from position 23 in the Player Statistics league to position 16. Overtaking such great players as Peter, Attila, Fab, Amrik, DanielA and even me! He continues the assault with three more cool demos. The first two on hunter.

• He did the Easy Run in 0:51, two seconds faster than Justin, by taking the short detour in the water to grab the grenade launcher and boost his way around the latter half of the map in what is fast becoming classic Bergendorff style.
• Same route except with one less grenade boost allowed him to do the Nightmare Run in 0:52, also two seconds faster than Justin.
• Then he took a break from capturing Optic records and moved on to a Marlo record instead. He went after the Easy Run of damaul3b and managed a one second improvement to 0:25. This now gives him 3 out of the 4 normal runs on this map...

The new blood mentioned at the start of this update is SDA first-timer Michael Hudson who improved Robert's Easy Run of r1m4 by two seconds to 0:52. Everyone please stand up and wave your todger in the air[1] in salute and welcome to Michael. The demo shows some big bunny skills and sweet gren jumping so hopefully this first demo won't be his last...

The old blood is a fella we haven't heard from since his last SDA update back at the start of 2001. Fuck knows where he's been, but it's good to see that he's still alive and, even more importantly, still playing Quake. Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming back Evan "windlash" Wagner. Evan teamed up with his old mukka Nolan Pflug to tackle the Easy 100% of the hugely long czg07c and they produced this 6:47. You know I get the feeling that Nolan really doesn't like that ogre on the bridge at the end. :-)

Nolan used the slack time while they were working on the coop demo to improve his own Easy 100% of the level by forty-seven seconds to 7:58. A masterly run with loads of close range rocket action, and keep an eye out for the pretty vore ball at the end...

And I couldn't let the opportunity pass to remind people that this was the fourth Easy 100% demo on this map. The first one being the cherry run by Amrik that was over THIRTY MINUTES in length! Sorry, Kochhy, but I just had to mention it.

Daniel Andersson is not only getting better all the time, he's also getting cockier.

• He took both runs on czgtoxic.
  • First he improved Joe's Easy Run by one second to 0:25. He says in his .txt file "nothing new, just faster than Joe (who's a slow arsed pussy)". Brave words.
  • The then used the same route and somehow survived the hail of damage to beat Amrik's Nightmare Run by five seconds to 0:26. He mailed me soon after sending this demo in to say that he meant to put in his .txt file "Amrik is not a very nice person and I would like to see him have a moderate amount of ill luck." Not quite such fierce words but you can see the sentiment behind them.
• Finally, he did a proper Nightmare Run of harmsway to make up for his farcical effort of last week. This 2:00 is a good run and twenty-five seconds faster than his previous demo. He says in his .txt about the previous record holder: "I'd really like to be able to suck Daniel's cock. No. Honestly. I really really would." And you know what? I believe him.

That's the demos. Don't forget (as if I'd let you) that the current contest in the Dimension Of The Gibbed challenge is running. So if you want to try and join Jozsef and Timo in the finished production head on over to The Gibopolis and get gibbing.

The QdQ page has been updated with all the recent independently produced multi level runs. This includes a new one from the enigmatically named Phil (a pseudonym for a Betelgeusian if ever I heard one) called Quake Done QUAD. It's a cheated run using god, impulse 9, impulse 255 and host_framerate cheats which means that the resulting times are F-A-S-T. He only managed to do the first three episodes before running out of enthusiasm but he did recam all his demos which make entertaining viewing. Top work Phil!

That's me finished for today, and I'm only half way through "Bloody Kisses". W00T! :-)

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

[1] If you are one of our fine lady readers you obviously can't wave your todger in the air. So feel free to either wave someone elses or alternatively you could.... No. On second thoughts don't get me started on the wonders of female anatomy. We'll be here all night.

The results of Dimension Of The Gibbed Part 2 : Castle Of The Gibbed are now up. Congratulations to Timo Nieminen who beat a very competitive field to come out on top.

Of course, since Part 2 of the contest is over it's time for part 3 to begin. So head on over to The Gibopolis for more death, slaughter and mayhem than you can possibly imagine. As this is a slightly harder map to complete you have until Midnight CET Sunday 20th October 2002 to get your entry in.

And just to prove that I've started work on the refilmed production I've prepared what we in the film industry call a "rush". A slightly unpolished but essentially finished recam of Joe's winning e1m1 demo. Download it here and see what you think...

Sorry to keep having to say stuff like this but once again it's going to be quite a brief update. Well, I say brief, obviously it'll be longer than "classic SDA" updates but I won't be hurling much abuse at people for two reasons. Firstly, I'm in a bit of a rush to go out. Secondly, I've just cracked one off and so am feeling rather placid and well disposed towards everyone at the moment. Any real sickos out there might want to keep that image in mind as you read on...

Daniel Andersson has gone and got himself a new PC, and to celebrate he took both the Long Way Runs on harmsway.

• He did the Easy Run in 1:39, two seconds faster than Martin.
• Then he used pretty much the same route, with a few detours for health, etc, in the Nightmare Run and got 2:25, one second faster than Justin. And if you're wonder how a similar route can be so much slower then just watch the demo. It's hilarious. MUST RIDICULE. Fool. :-)

More demos are in from the man voted as Time Magazines "Bitch Whore Of The Year", Thomas Bergendorff.

• He started off with what I think is the first Rogue improvement this year! He improved Optic's Nightmare Run of r1m5 by five seconds to 1:13. A very nice run on a very difficult map.
• Next he tried the 100%s on drakopf.
  • He did the Easy 100% in 0:19, one second faster than Ken. A nice, long, quadded intermission grenade kill in this one. :-)
  • And the Nightmare 100% three seconds faster than Justin. 0:22. A little luck with monster fighting each other which grouped them nicely for the quad grenade kill. :-)

Weixing "Filthy" Ye has been having a good week. Not only has he joined the "filthy few" over on the Bunny Comparison page by becoming the tenth person to do e2m1 in under eight seconds, he also did three nice demos...

• He ignored the last few grunts at the start of the Nightmare 100% of em1 and slaughtered them in passing when they ran outside. This saved him three seconds over his previous time getting 0:49.
• Then he improved his Easy 100% of the intensely frustrating (scrag-wise) scream by two seconds to 1:04.
• And finally he did a table filler for us. He filled the empty slot for the Easy 100% of imp1sp2 in 2:14. Not a bad demo for a TF but should be quite easy to improve. :-) Do I need to remind you people the the Nightmare Run on this map is still unclaimed?

He wasn't the only preson to submit Bunny Comparison demos in the last week, we also had sumbissions from Dangerous David Miller, Thomas Terroooaaaar Stubgaard, Twisted Thomas Bergendorff and Dr Death David Hocking. (Note: Those aren't their real names, I just made them up. Amazing, eh?)

I couldn't resist slipping in a quick reminder that the Castle Of The Gibbed contest is running. You have, errrr, five and a bit more days to get your entries in. Don't be a fool like Thomas Bergendorff or Daniel Andersson who apparently "forgot" to send in their entries to the last contest (yeah, right), and try not to be unlucky like Anders Nordensten who's demo got lost somewhere between him pressing "send" and, errr, somewhere else.

In case anyone missed the announcement, David "SnooP" Hocking has released his one man Easy Run through the whole of Quake in 11:55 that he's called SnooP Shafts Shub. The runs are excellent but by far the best thing about it is the title. I laughed for hours. But seriously, tRR had better come out soon or someone is going to upstage it like this before it's even seen the light of day!

Finally, Sassa and the rest of the guys over on the NetQuake Europe site have recently made some nice movies of their deathmatch exploits and trickjumping skills. The downloads are fairly hefty but the results are entertaining so if, like me, you like to DM using only your eyes you might want to give them a viewing.

Hmmm. I think I fancy another one now.

Cheerio.

All demos download is available here (Denmark).

The results of the first part of the Dimension Of The Gibbed contest is over. Go here to see the full list of results and download all the demos.

And once you've finished gasping at the uber-1337 skillz on display head on over to the Castle Of The Gibbed for the second contest of the series. If the level of support for these contests stays this high all the way through the series you will make me a very happy sadistic old fucker indeed.

And don't forget that everyone who submits a demo will get a mention in the final production. Probably something along the line of the "Hall of Twats" room in RDE, or the "Gimps on Plinths" in SCBB. Or maybe not.

SDA : Who the hell do they think they are?